Posted on June 26, 2008 - by Lance Ong

The Greatest Barrier to Success

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In life, there are barriers which hold us back from achieving what we want. And these barriers come in two forms – internal and external. The external barriers are easy to deal with. Things like not having enough money or opportunity or time. All you need to do is study the problem, generate solutions, and take action on it. If it doesn’t fix the problem, try another solution… easy.

It’s the internal barriers which are difficult to deal with because they are INVISIBLE. Internal barriers are those which are within your very own mind. You can’t see them… but you can feel it. And to the untrained mind, you might not recognize what is causing your frustration or pain. You might say it’s because of other people or bad luck that causes your failure. But seldom do people admit the cause is within them. How they choose to spend their time, how they treat other people, mood swings, the training they put themselves through or lack of… all serves to decide the outcome of their lives.

The problem is we are blind to what is within us… Can you fight an enemy you can’t see? Our unconscious identity, beliefs, values, habits and thinking patterns…. These are what determine how we act in the world, and thus the results we get. But they are invisible to you because they are part of you. That’s why the greatest barrier to success is our very own selves.

Your mind has two parts… the conscious and the unconscious. Your conscious mind is like the tip of an iceberg floating above sea-level. Your unconscious mind is the other 90% of the iceberg’s mass which lies hidden in the depths of the water.

The conscious mind is male; the unconscious mind… is female. Like Yin and Yang. The tip of the iceberg (Yang), so proud and mighty, sticks its head out of the water. But like any man who manages to stand up in the world, he has a loving woman (Yin) backing him. So your ability to succeed in the world relies heavily on the conditioning and support of your unconscious mind.

That which you call passion or motivation, relies on the unconscious mind to deliver. A person can act as if they are busy and full of drive, but yet be unmotivated on the inside – there is no fire. They do not have support from their unconscious mind. The ‘woman’ in their life has switched off. They go through the motions of acting successful, but their actions are ineffective in producing results simply because they do not love what they are doing.

Love is the ultimate energy; so simple yet so complicated. With love, you have passion… a willingness to suffer for your cause. And when you dedicate yourself wholeheartedly to a specific purpose, the Universe cooperates to help you succeed. Life wants to see commitment.

If you have read my article about Happiness and Transience, you know about the importance of the journey and appreciating the walk or jog rather than being obsessed with the destination. You also know how to choose activities with a present and future benefit. I’d like to add a layer of understanding to that by talking about choosing your destination.

Sometimes a person grows up without making an effort to decide the course of their life. Their major goals were selected for them by their parents or suggested to them by their friends. They never took the time to consider what they really want for themselves. It was always about what they should do or have to do; never about what they personally want to do.

So it might not amaze you that some people are putting 100% effort into climbing the wrong mountain — chasing a goal or achievement which is not inspiring to them. They are told it is important, so they work at it. But in their hearts, it is a hollow pursuit.

Are you guilty of operating like a robot? Have you buried your spirit somewhere under that work facade? Are you climbing Mount Oberon when what you really yearn for is Everest?

(I did enjoy this hike though...)

When you love what you are doing, you have passion. When you don’t, you have apathy (lack of enthusiasm). And it can be really painful to feel apathetic about work, yet be obligated to wake up every morning to do the same meaningless job.

The result is different if you love your work because you’re willing to put in extra effort. You bounce out of bed in the morning knowing that there is something important you can accomplish today. Your work is purposeful. It’s directed at achieving your life’s goal. It’s no longer just about working for money, it’s about working to fulfill your highest contribution to the world. You would do this even if no one paid you.

The problem is people jump into the job market before deciding what they want to do with their life. They look to the world to show them their options; letting society decide what they should be, when what they should do instead is figure out their destination first, then go to the world to find ways to get there.

If you leave it to the corporations to give you fulfillment and meaning in life, you’re in for a big surprise. They’re not interested in your happiness… what they’re looking out for is their bottom line. They’re thinking how they can buy your hours for $10 and sell your effort for $100.

You have to take an active role in deciding your life’s direction. Decide where you want to be that will be personally meaningful to you. Aim for what you want, not what others want. That is the meaning of freedom.

Ideally everyone should try to get into a line of work which they enjoy. But this is not always easy. Sometimes we are simply born into disadvantageous circumstances. I know some people who have heavy responsibilities, where they had to work from an early age to care for disabled parents or siblings who were still in school.

But that does not mean we should not strive to gradually improve our circumstances and shift into a line of work we find fulfilling and meaningful.

One of the rewards of starting out with little is you treasure your success more. You have the opportunity to go from zero to hero. Something that those born with a silver spoon miss out on.

Variety is the spice of life. And with your zero to hero journey, you are getting the maximum variety life has to offer. If you’re ready for even more variety, you can go from zero to hero and lose it all to be a zero again, then build it back to hero.

And if you had done something crazy like that, then you realize that material wealth and possessions are superficial — just toys for you to play with in this lifetime.

Of course, the toys are tempting when you don’t have them at first… but once you’ve tried them all, then you come back to appreciate the joys found in the simple things in life.

Remember, the best things in life are free: nature walks, swimming, drawing, whistling, singing, a loving partner, cooking, gardening, reading, writing, chatting, helping someone out….

So I want you to take this into consideration when deciding your destination in life. When you’re young you think money is the secret to happiness because you can buy everything you want. When you’re older you realize that although some possessions are fun, they are not what makes a life worth living.

Now I’m not going to dictate exactly what makes a life worth living because… aren’t you supposed to decide your destination for yourself?

The destination really depends on your preference. My suggestion is what you should be aiming for is toward the intangible side of life. The things that money can’t buy

Here’s an idea: If you spend all your youth chasing money, when you’re old, you’ll spend all your money chasing youth. :p

Okay, the most important lesson to take away from this is: climb the right mountain. And be brave to switch mountains if you find you’re on the wrong one.

One of my goals is to help you gain the cooperation of your unconscious mind; to kindle the fire within you and bring the woman inside back into your life. To succeed, you need to be aligned internally. We need to remove those mental blocks to success. And when you do that, a light will turn on inside you, and suddenly the world will seem like a brighter, happier place. You will feel a sense of certainty and purpose while discovering new opportunities to get to where you want to go.

In future articles, we’ll work on gaining support from this 90% of your iceberg — your unconscious mind.

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